From xpurple@email.com Thu Jan  6 20:27:12 2000
Date: Thu, 6 Jan 2000 20:24:32 -0600 (CST)
From: xpurple 
To: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Subject: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The story of the turds

Once uppon a time, in a land far, far away thier lived a man named john.
He was a good man, a kind man.  But he had a dirty job.  John worked in a
looney bin.  He spent his days makeing shure people where still breating,
and not causing problems for themselves, or others.  This included
cleaning up after them.

Once in a while, some of the 'specal people' would soil themselves.  It
was john's job to clean them up.  He didn't paticuraly enjoy his job very
much, but it payd the bills.

On some day in july, a rather hot july day.  He went in to see if the
person in room number 42 was still alive.  Luckely for john's sake he was
(You don't want to know what happens to people who have clients die on
thier shift).  Though the 'specal person' had made a large mess on the
floor.  He had apparently had a bit too much fiber in his diet, and not
enough fluids.  He had been constipated for the last week and a half, but
refused help.  The problem would have been quite simple to fix, just a
quick enama, or some laxitive.  But, this was not to be.

Today was the day that it had built up to be a serious problem.  He had
dropped his load all over the foor of his room.  It was john's job to
clean up the rather firm, and dark turds.

The thought of this did not please john one bit.  Quite a few of the turds
had trace ammounts of blood on them.  Apparently the 'specal person' had
used a bit too much force to expel them from his bowls.

First off though, john had to clean up the 'specal person'.  This was not
an easy task.  Since the 'specal person' was deaf, dumb, and had a serious
temper problem.  A good fight was put up, causing much distress to our
friend john.  The fight went on for several minuits, the end results came
out to a broken chair, turds flung about the room haphazardly, a sore
elbow, and a rather distraught 'specal person'.

An odd note of intrest, One of the turds was flung out an open window
where it hit a nun walking down the street.  She was rather displeased by
this turn of events.  Causing her to say things that no nun in her right
mind would even dream of thinking.

After finaly restraining the 'specal person', john proceded to clean the
turd bits off of him.  Then, after completing that task, he proceded to
pick up all but one of the turds from the floor.  Save the one that hit
the nun.  John's next step was to mop the floor, and beat the 'specal
person' for his wrong doing.


You have now heard the sorty of the turds.