Did you know that it's going to be easy for the .gov to track you by your cell phone soon? Yep, put in place so they can track 911 calls (not a bad idea, but it sucks). It lets companys know your movement paters, lets the .gov know where you are at all times (within 50-150 meters anyway). Close enough that you can never hide.

Not unless you drop the cell phone that is.

We at xpurple.com demand the stop of celphone usage. Voice comminication is such a waste. The bandwith could be used for much better things, more usefull things.

Not to mention that I spend most of my days talking to people on the phone, and when someone with a cell phone calls in, I want to reach through the phone and snap thier neck.

I'm yet to kill anyone (or am not aware of doing so), but if stress keeps going up :)

Speaking of stress, I had to do an install today. Sure, half a days wages for an hours work isn't such a bad thing, but danmit! I had to use a bloody PC! Not just any crappy PC, but one running windows 95 OSR1.

It's enough to make me start drinking.

Well, ok, it wasn't so bad. It could have been running OS/2. If that was the case, I would have gone to 22nd and howard in omaha, and got some crack. It would have caused less brain damage than using OS/2.

I need more angry german techno in my mp3 collection, but it's just so hard to find :(

I'm drinking coffee in the only barnes and noble in the free world that doesn't have wireless internet access, yet still charges 2$ for a cup of coffee.

My conversation with the staff went something like this..."

xpurple: "I want a cup of coffee"

staff: "That will be 2$, cash or credit?"

xpurple: "Can I have the coffee without the cocane in it?"

staff: *dumb look*

xpurple: "Here's 2$, now give me that which is the cause of all 3v1l!"

staff: "coffee, right?"

xpurple: "j00 b3tt3r h4nd 1t 0v3r!"

staff: "huh?"

xpurple: "Sorry, you probably don't speak l33t. Nevermind"

I walked away with coffee that cost enough to include a fair ammount of cocane, heh.

Then on the way to work this morning, I stoped at mcdonalds. It was amusing, and resulted in a girl laughing.

First off I asked for a couple slabs of cow death, and some bread. Not long after it was decided that something involving fish would be good, because that would be one less fish to procreate in the water I drink. I don't drink water because fish do nasty things in it (like sex).

I was sure to let the girl at the counter know that this is why I was getting fish. Then I asked for some extra napkins because they where made from dead trees, and I hate the enviorment.

Too bad they don't use the polystyrne containers anymore. Those where *very* bad for the enviorment. I let her know about this as well, and how much I wish they where back.

When she finaly got around to asking if there was anything else she could get for me, I asked her shoe size. That's the point when she realied that my plot was not so much as to give her a hard time, but to confuse her. It made her laugh.

It was luckey that she had a good sence of humor :)

One day I fully expect to be beaten to a pulp by this sort of action. More so, I want it to happen! Danmit, this is supposto be a free country, and if I want to get my face beat in by some pimply kid working for minimum wage, that's my right!

Well, sorta. Just think of how much cash I'd made if it happend? I could sue the resturant for hireing such a violent, and dangerous person. Mmm, then I could afford a TiBook, and a new flat screen iMac!

It would be even better if the manager was the person to cause the problem. I'd just call up the police, and tell them I was being assulted. It's not yet aganst the law to be an asshole :)

Well, I'm almost out of cocane laced coffee, so I should probably get back home soon.

In the next issue I'll explain why you never run around with a lage sign that says "Abort the gay, unborn midgets for jesus!". It was definitly one way to get attention...

EOF