I can't sleep.

I can't sleep.

Hmm, I feel better now.

Three day weekend, fucked my sleep scedule hardcore. Heh, not that I realy had one to start with. It's 04:40, and I spent a couple hours stareing at the celing. Sleep doesn't want to 0wn me. At least I've got a corn dog. Yes, a corn dog. I am 'borrowing' it from my roomate. He can have it back in about 4 days (don't ask). Though I don't think he will bother asking. Hehe ;)

So, I'm sitting here with a corndog, my laptop that's in the process of dying...not to mention a half dismembered Macintosh. Pondering what to do. I have to work in the morning. hmm, 12:00 isn't so morning, but still. It means I have to be awake when that evil bright thing comes up in the sky. I realy hate that thing. It makes me want to buy shades.

You see, the .gov realy does have control over the sun. Yep, they have this little knob in norad that adjusts how bright it is. Also a little timer for when it comes up / goes down. It's all so they can rake in tax money from the sale of hats, sunscreen, and shades.

How could they be this evil!?

They are the .gov, what else would you expect from them? Anything for a buck. They have no morals...just look at what clinton did to his secratary. Gesh, I wouldn't want that slut even getting near me, let alone sucking my dick.

This is probably the worst corndog I've ever had. Way too much cornbread, and not enough dog. I want the proteen danmit! Hmm, the last few days I've been in a meat eating mood. Shying away from most anything else. Let me explain my diet this weekend.

Day 1: Chinese resturant by the mall (in lincoln (not spelled lincon (like I thought it was before))). About 7 pounds of some roasted animal. Yes, 7 pounds.

Day 2: Mcdonalds (by the mall again). 8 slices of cow death without any of that vegie shit. Just cow death, and a bun. Ohh, that makes my mouth water so much.

Day 3: Lots of fatning polish sausages. Yep, the kind that are like 90% fat. Mmm, good! Oh, and some beans for flavor (the side effects have just started). Also just about the worst corndog I've ever had.

Missing teeth make eating corndogs more enjoyable. I just pop the stick (with the remaining bits of random animal flesh, and baked goods in my mouth. Close mouth fully, and pull. Strips the stuff right off.

While I'm on the subject of missing teeth, let me note a few more benifits of this.

1. Smokeing. I can place the smoke where my tooth is missing, and not fear it falling out while talking.

2. Looks. It gives me a bit of charecter. Heh, course running around in a trench coat, with a distraut look on my face helps this also.

3. Cock sucking. With teeth like this nobody's going to ever want me to suck thier cock :)

4. Nipple sucking. The empty space is just about right to tease a nipple to a most perfect sort of hardness. (note that this only works with AAA-AA tits).

5. Straws. I can fully lock my jaw, and still drink with a straw.

6. Biting the heads off live chickens. Umm, wait I'm not that kind of geek...

ENOUGH!

I realy need to clean off my desk. It would be a far more productive use of my time. Course, then you wouldn't get to know what *realy* goes on in my head. You would miss that, I know you would. Trust me, either you love me, or you hate me. Either way, you will never forgit me.

The walmart theroy

I went to walmart today, err, realy yesterday (but I'm still up, so where not going to get into details right now (deal with it))). Went there to get some soada, meat, and beans (note day 3). It took me forever to find the real stuff. IE, non low fat. Gesh, what the hell is up with all this health nut shit? If I wish to eat a whole jar of *REAL* manoyse in one sitting...I will. This is america, land of the free. The place where we are allowed to do dumb things (and quite often get paid for it).

Hmm, sidetracking again.

So, I get what I came for. Took long enough... Head to the magazine rack to see if they are cool enough to actualy carry computer shopper. Hmm, they do, but it's the slimed down version. Yep, just the articles mam. Fuck that, I want the real thing. 99% adds, who reads thier articles anyway? I just want the ads.

To the left I notice a *huge* section dedicated to bibles, and carrying cases for said items. This is when I figured out thier true ajenda. It's to make amerika a *good* place to live. I'm shure they get throwbacks from the church. This also explains why you can't buy CDs with naughty words there. Moreover, I've never been able to find anything by Bad Religion there. Even the discs that don't have naughty words in 'em (most of them).

Aside from that, they won't even let me order them. Comeing up with the excuse every time that they only carry 'quality' music that good people listen to. My response to that every time is...

"Bitch, what the fuck are you talking about? You have this album called WSYWIG that shows a picture of two dogs fucking on the cover. How's that good?"

"Realy?"

"Yep, and I'm not even going to mention this other album that basicly says that drugs are a good idea. Your just asking for trouble with that sort of thing"

"Oh, Hmm, Well, I can't order this 'bad religtion' stuff for you. Maby if you speak with the manager"

"Hmm, doesn't that nametag on your shirt say 'manager'?"

"I forgot mine today, so I borrowed it from him."

"Ohh, now I understand why it says 'bob'."

Walmart just pisses me off, they say low prices. HAH! Quite often they are a bit more expensive. And, even if thier prices are a bit lower...it's a bit. Is it realy worth my time to drive all over town to save 10 cents at each store? Nope. I'd burn more that my total savings in gas.

The other thing, is that most the people who work there don't realy have a clue of what they are doing. Let alone realy care. Heh, then the logo says 'we care'...bah!

The only bonus of walmart today was the person at the checkout. Ohh! I haven't seen her in what seems like ages (actualy about six months). For the life of me I can't remember her first name though. Argh! This has been driving me mad since I talked to her. On a note of intrest, she's rather attractive. Also last I remember, she drives a truck. Ohh, that's the stuff dreams are made of (stick even).

I think the address to my page on the back of my truck realy is getting me more hits. I can see it in thier eyes. Kina like 'Who is this freak!?'. Heh, also similar to a vanity plate. But instead of like 7 digits, it's several megs of information. Usless, offensive, entertaining, and addictive.

I don't know how I lived before screen. If you don't have screen now, get it. Heh, even if you have some lame OS like windows...course, to use screen you can't be in windows. Install linux, or FreeBSD, just so you can enjoy screen. Just trust me on this.

Course, if you own a Macintosh, don't worry about it. Thier is no command prompt, so it would be pretty useless. Hmm, give it a try anyway.

Nobody is up on IRC. Lots of the regulars are there, but are *IDLE*. Kina a prick tease of sorts. ICQ is being dumb. I actualy haven't used ICQ in about a week. Pretty pointless, god it sucks compared to IRC. IRC is where real men are real men, real wemon are real wemon, and finaly where real perverts are whatever the hell they want to be. It's all about the BitchX baby!

Note that you need to have a good leetness factor to use BitchX...otherwise it will format your HD, and cheat on your taxes. Don't laugh, it happend to somebody once. Yep, a friend of a friends brother's friend's mom. (she had a very low leetness factor (to the point of being quite negitave))

If your a stupid fuck who doesn't know how to use DOS, get mIRC. It sucks, but will let you talk to people with a very high leetness factor. Just as a note, never let anybody know you use mIRC (Thusly implying you are a stupid fuck who doesn't know DOS). It will get you banned, kicked, attacked, stalked, or even raped/murdered. All from the comfort of your own home.

Trust me, you don't want to see an internet rape actualy take place. Not a pretty sight. It's some realy fucked up shit...

Course, as you would probably expect thier is a way for people who are too stupid to even stick a disk in the drive to surf the web. Yep, WebTV. You can't break it (hmm, I shouldn't realy say that). I'll just say it's a lot harder to break than a windows box. Heh, that's saying a lot. Windows machines break if you look at them funny. God forbid you set a *REAL* computer near them. They just say 'Fuck you, I quit', and promptly bluescreen.

Yep, it means you don't need to understand the diffrence between 'memory', and 'storage'. Such a simple thing, yet so many people just can't grasp it. That's because WebTV doesn't have either. Nope, it's a 90$ POS you can buy at walmart. It also has porn sites blocked out by default. Why whould good, moral peole want to look at porn anyway? Let alone the fact that software/music pirates can't use it for anything iligal (due to having no memory, or storage).

So, in short, don't buy a WebTV unit unless your IQ is about the same as a pile of cow dung (prase the cow, provider of milk, cheese, and other wonderfull dairy products).

I've just submited a request to be listed on www.textfiles.com, yep. I've sold out. Deal with it.

Deal with it, hmm, my new motto (I belive). I enjoy saying that for some preverse reason.

Only 107 more files, and I've beat the cDc in number. Hmm, maby then I'll get all the girls? Nah...Life is more complex than that. If I realy wanted girls hanging about me, I wouldn't be sitting up at 06:00 on a stolen laptop writeing about it. I'd be out in bars (for the older, more experenced wemon), or in malls (for the underage candy sniffers).

The bonus with older wemon, is they already know what they want. Also, they know what you want. No training is nessasary. Also, since they arn't virgins, they don't bleed all over everything.

Candy sniffers have the bonus of being much tigheter, more firm breats (and better sizes). Not to mention the fact they they do bleed. (It's a bit of a shock the first time, pulling your cock out with blood on it) Also, they are a bit more willing to try 'diffrent' things, just to see what it's like. You know, the ususal, anal, nasel, in the ear. Yep, *nods head*

On a more serious note, I should get a *little sleep* an hour should do me fine...

EOF