Currently on the phone to somebody who realy doesn't deserve to be in the gene pool.

Annoying people. She doens't even know what I mean when I say click on the icon. Fuck!

Had an intrestening thing happen to me recently. Some girl pointed at the sign on the back of my truck, and noted 'You have an internet thing!'. Apparently this made her think I was cool or something. Hmm, waste of my time.

I just chewed through 'Maison Ikkoki' Volume two. It's like 3:30 in the morning, and I'm still in lincoln. Hmm, doesn't look like I'm getting much sleep tonnite. If any. But, that's ok. I work 2-10 tommorow. Should be easy. Plus it's a wed. Those days tend to be slow, but steady. Just enough to keep attention focused, but not so busy that I want to shoot myself, and others.

I'll chew through 'Maison Ikkoku' volume three in a nice hot bath when I return home. I love that series. Real people in real situations. No big robots, or psycic powers.

No to mention that I can relate very well to one of the main charecters. Godai yusaku, a guy who's very shy. Is in love with this girl, but can't get up the nerve to let her know. Though, in an ironic fassion gets very close to her anyway. Mostly because he realy does care. It's not just some skin deep obsession. It's realy love.

Makes me think about myself. I can never get the nerve to ask a girl out, or anything even closely related. But, I end up consoling them on a regualer basis. I listen well, and actualy care what thier saying.

So many thing that yousaku does are the same as myself. Not much diffrence, not realy. Except that I'm real (I think at least), and can change. But, would I want to? Would I realy be happy being a 'pimp'? I don't think so.

Though, I am lonely. Course, I should be usto that by now. My roomate is leaving for truck driving school next week. I applaud him, he's getting a job he will like. But, it will leave me home alone all the time. That depresses me. He's got some annoying habbits (don't we all?), but I'd miss 'em. It's nice to have somebody to come home to. Somebody I can share my thoughts with over coffee.

If, if, if only.

Rarely do I meet a girl that is worth my time. But, on occasion it does happen. Then they are either already in a relationship, and I am too honerable to interviene, or... Or, I'm just to pathetic and weak to do anything. They tell me of thier troubles. I listen. We become good friends, and the thought of doing anything becomes a bad idea. Being in the wrong position for such a thing. Being too much of an honorable person.

One day, maby, I can hope.

But, hope won't get me anywhere. Not realy, not realy at all.

I'm going to take a hot bath, sometimes this hour long drive sucks.

Oh, it rained today, hail, big hail. Golfball sized, and some bigger. I drove through it anyway. Can't be late. Can't be late. I did that once, never again. It's kina refreshing to do 75 through blinding rain, and hail though. All the other cars pulled over on the side of the road. Leaving it all to me. Ohh, that's power.

EOF