I recived an odd letter today, one that I didn't expect to ever recive at this point...a letter from auriel...I have not heard from her in a long time...six months to a year...I never expected to hear from her again...it makes me happy, but sad at the same time...Maby she's changed her mind, and dosn't think I'm such a bad guy after all...maby she's as lonely as I am...I don't know. Whatever the reason, it makes me quite happy. I miss her quite a bit...But t's definitly easyer to know she still exists, and took the time to write me...I left the friendship pretty open endedly...Gave my opinions, and waited for a reply...waited six months to a year...patently...I don't know what to do now...I'm between jobs...kina still employed, but not realy...not the kind of employment that pays...I am probably going to have some fucked up dreams tonnite...I am debating on going back to florida...but I don't know...will communicate more to see sup with things...thier is a chance that the trip would be a pointless endeviour...Right now I'm back in mankato minasoda...a pretty boring place realy, I'm realy not shure why I'm here, but I am anyway...it depresses me to no end...The drive from clear lake iowa to here I was half crying the entire trip...partly due to memorys that have resurfaced, and partly due to the CD I was listening to (pretty hate machine (NIN)). That CD makes me depressed every time I listen to it, but I love the CD anyway...it was my first experence with NIN...I love that band (guy)...I would love to contine a relationship with her, but I don't know if that's a good idea...too many things to chance, and a chance of being hurt very baddly by a large marine. I must go now, and complete the task that brought me to this god-forsaken town...EOF